Salty Tails Blog Takeover

Dear Richard Stephens

Dear Rick

To whom it may concern

LISTEN UP!

As of Sunday, I have taken over your Blog.

IF you ever want to use it again you will send me 1,000,000 Pounds of fresh (Peeled) shrimp in vacuum-sealed, UNMARKED bags.

My demands are NOT NEGOTIONABLE. IF you tell anyone, (Especially not my Boat-Mate Stormy) or Refuse, to HONOR my simple request, you - Richard Stephens - will never blog again.

While I await your timely response, I will be blogging my own personal thoughts, PASSIONS, and rantings. I can guarantee it will be better than the dribble you usually spew - except when it’s about me or Pirate Tales of Course.

Sincerely yours

Salty Tails

PS, in addition, to the Fresh shrimp, Please send me a tub of your fantastic chicken salad. That Jerk of a dog Cuervo just ate the last one you sent me. I hope it makes him sick. 

http://www.facebook.com/SaltyTails 

Pirate Tales only $2.99 at Amazon 

Hey everybody! This is Salty Tails again.

While Ricks busy formatting my second book, Vanished Tales, I’m taking over his blog.

Today I want to invite everyone to my new facebook page.

I was sick & tired of Rick getting all the attention so I’ve taken matters into my own Paws. He seems to forget that’s IT’S ALL ABOUT ME! While your there, feel free to Post your thoughts and awesome accolades about me and my books. (You have read Pirate Tales, right?) Well what are you waiting for? I want you to go to Amazon right now and buy it. It’s only $2.99. Surely you can afford $2.99. I’ll bet that double mocha Latte you bought this morning cost more than that. So don’t think, just do it!

And stop by and –Like- me on facebook today. Or else I’ll be forced to do something…I don’t know what, but it’ll be something bad.

http://www.facebook.com/SaltyTails

http://www.amazon.com/Pirate-Tales-Salty-Mystery 

Hey everybody! This is Salty Tails.

Since Rick’s off doing whatever writers do when they’re not playing solitaire on the computer (Probably taking a nap) I’ve confiscated his blog. I guess this will teach him to leave his passwords around.  Wait until he gets his credit card statement.

Anyway, I just wanted to clear up a few misconceptions about my novels. First off, can you believe Rick still thinks he writes my books? What a laugh. Sure, he cleans them up and formats them for me, but regardless of what the idiot claims, he did not write them. They are all my creation! Mine I tell you!

I have, however, allowed Rick this temporary delusion of grandeur because I’ve found he works cheaper that way. Besides, I really don’t want to train another human right now. Not that training humans is all that difficult. I mean, just look at the human I live with. Why I had Stormy McGuire trained within the first month of my adoption. And as for his best friend, JD? Training him to bring me a treat every time he came to visit us on our houseboat was a piece of Tuna (Cats don’t eat cake). Way easier than training a dog. Don’t get me started on dogs. Monica, our neighbor has a yellow lab named Cuervo. What a waste of fur he turned out to be.

You know? This blogging thing is kinda fun, I may have to do this more often.

What the? Salty! Just what do you think your doing? Bad cat! Bad cat! Get off my blog… and stop calling me Rick; my name is Richard.

Uh oh, looks like Rick woke up in a grumpy mood. But don’t worry; I still have his passwords. All of his passwords.

Get your copy of Pirate Tales on Amazon today